Medium Thoughts

It’s ok….I will be you until you can be you again

Friends are the people who you surround yourself with to help you with life. They are the ones you call when you find out you’re expecting your first child, the ones you talk to about a bad break up. They are there when you are sitting in the emergency room with a sick child. Friends grow up with you, and grow old with you. unfortunately not every friend is equal. Do you ever notice how you have certain friends you talk to depending on what you need to talk about? Some are great to shop with! Some of them are really good listeners while others are great distractions. No 2 are alike and there is a good chance that you really wouldn’t want them to be the same. After all, you chose them as your friends for a reason. Personally, I think an empath is my favorite type of friend, to be honest.

An Empath is perfect because of many reasons, and here is a few…

  1. I’ve never been one to look for sympathy, in fact it makes me feel worse instead of better. I would rather someone just listen and understand, but not be afraid to set me straight if I’m heading down a pity path.
  2. Empathetic friends tend to really understand what you’re feeling. What I mean is they connect with the energy I have and literally feel what I feel, so when they say I understand they mean it.
  3. Empathy vs sympathy an Empathetic person will feel with you, sort it out with you but they will not be burdened with it. Once the mission is complete they can move on. A sympathetic person will grieve the situation for you, forever. They will drudge it up every time they see you. Asking you if you are ok, and reliving the event over and over is really not helpful.

Over all an empathetic friend is one that will take the reins for you and just let you ride along. They can handle what you can’t right now, but they will not abuse the trust you share. The phrase “walk a mile in my shoes” is very true of an empath.

“When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.”
Henri J.M. Nouwen, Out of Solitude: Three Meditations on the Christian Life

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